Just say NO!

April 28, 2010 by Ingrid
Filed under Parenting Advice Articles

The current chairman for the PTA is stepping down and they want me to take her place. So they’ve kindly called a pre re-election meeting to let me know what the role entails, aka, ‘A hound me into submission meeting’. ‘Why don’t you do it, I ask? Pointing to the nearest pleader in my sight. ‘Because you’ll be great at rallying new parents in’, they all say in unison like an out of tune choir. ‘You’ve got loads of energy and everyone will listen to you’. I suspect what they’re really saying is: Coz you’ve got the biggest gob Ingrid!

They say if I don’t take up the challenge, the PTA will be no more! No pressure then! My chief concern however, is amount of time it will encroach on my already ‘no time to fart’ diary, but I’m a wee bit nervous about saying that magical word that will save me from this parental onslaught – ‘No’

Closing the loophole to my next excuse of, if it isn’t that bad you continue to do it then, was the current chairman who pleads her Mothers illness as the reason why she’s leaving,. ‘You won’t have to do as many events as I did’, she adds reassuringly. The coalition are nodding furiously in agreement with their hands clasped together as though in prayer. ‘Honestly’ she soothes, stroking my arm lovingly ‘It’ll be finneeeee’.

In my head, I’m saying, say NO Ingrid. But standing up to these desperate parents hovering over me like a pack of hungry hounds, is a feat even for me. My internal dialogue is now in a full on battle with what is actually coming out of my gob. ‘Err, well…errrrm let me see’, I cowardly murmur. Yet to take on this task, my own work would suffer, or over exhaustion would be the order of the day. My head is reminding me that I rarely get to bed before midnight, the over flowing in tray and the ten page to do list. ‘Just say No, for Christ’s sake’, the yet to be defeated voice in my head yells. Just say NOOOOOO.

Getting Your Groove Back Tip:

We often put other people’s needs before our own. But just as we’re about to muster the courage to say, No, the guilt-o-meter kicks in.

The mind is like a soap opera too. Whenever we think about being assertive, stepping out of our comfort zone or trying something new, not even the writers of Eastenders, can come up with story lines to match what comes into our heads to stop us in our tracks.

So whilst my soap opera mind, says: if you say no, the PTA will become extinct, they’ll be no summer fete. Everyone will think you don’t care about the school; my son will loose his mates, his confidence and therefore his LIFE!!!

What actually happened was this. I said, ‘No, sorry, gave it a lot of thought, I simply don’t have the time. To which they said…. ’Oh that’s a shame; Sharon will do it then but would be great if you could still get involved and help out whenever you can!

Check out the fortnightly Grtting Your Groove Back Column in The South London Press in the Pulse Section on a Friday!